Such a Tease

You only tease people you like, right?  Well then, I'm really liked.  Haha!  At least it feels that way, sometimes.

"Sure, I'm a pretty girl, up in a pretty world" and tend to just "sit still, look pretty" and take it (Name that tune!)  basically because I don't know what else to do in the moment. 

But seriously, my grandfather teases me all the time; my brother did as well growing up.  I'm used to it, you could say.  It can be good.  Teasing can build bonds, be flirty, lighten the mood, show affection, and can actually be really funny and fun.

Just last week during my army training, I was teased hardcore by my fellow Reservists.  One of my favorites had me laughing, rolling my eyes, shaking my head, feeling the love, and trying desperately to have a witty comeback. 

On the one hand, I don't mind teasing because it's usually mutual and because I do think people tease others when they like them and are just trying to be playful, doing it in a fun-loving manner not mean or spiteful or with ill-intent.  On the other hand, I do mind because occasionally I don't have thick enough skin and I don't ever seem to have a good comeback!  Ugh. 

My outlook is to not tease people about what makes us different, since I think being your own unique person is awesome.  I actually want to learn from people who are different than me or like different things than me.  I suppose I tease to flirt or because the person was teasing me first. 

Honestly, I'm nice and want others to be nice to me, and I think they will be.  That might be mistake number one.  I take people at their word and think very realistically for the most part, mistake number two.  So, I assume what people say is in line with the truth, unless it's blatantly obvious that it's not.  A guy friend started a statement saying along the lines of, "Well, when I was a teenage girl…"  I just laughed and playfully pushed him while rolling my eyes because he was being a goober.  It's times like this when I can absolutely tell that someone is teasing in an innocent way that I don't mind at all. 

The same friend had to say "I'm messing with you" several times.  I learned but had relapses.  See mistake number one.  Though at one point, I did get him back with a prank :)  Gotta love it. 

However, sometimes people tease too much.  It's downright mean and possibly venturing into passive aggressiveness.  Not cool.  I'm positive I've done this at some point but the example that comes to mind is when it was done to me.  A friend said he had a souvenir for me.  I was excited because I like stuff like that but then I was also puzzled because I had no idea what the heck he would have.  Well, come to find out, he was completely kidding, having absolutely nothing for me.  Boo.  Unfortunately, it didn't stop there because he made me feel silly for believing him and "hadn't learned anything about him."  See mistake number two. 

But yes, I did learn.  Not only did I learn to "not believe anything that comes out of his mouth" but I also learned he is surprisingly quite the dichotomy.  He is the nerd I thought he was in the things he enjoys -- aren't we all nerds deep down?! -- such as liking video games and cats a lot (like a lot) but then he also likes to workout/powerlift and is actually funny.  Can that really all be found in the same person?  He's usually not shy to state his opinion and is wrong sometimes (no, sorry, I don't think you have all your nutrition figured out, for instance) yet does a good job of leading, getting things done.  Once I got past some of the teasing, I noticed streaks of genuine niceness like the time he gave me a straight up compliment and another time he recognized/appreciated something I had done to help out.  Then, when he's not putting up a defensive front, I saw his ability to intelligently talk about a range of topics.  I realized I didn't know him very well before training but was thankful he and others were there to make it more bearable and just determined people come into your life at a certain time for a reason.  Overall, I think I observed many things in him and learned he's basically nothing like me, it seems, except possibly for liking Indian food and needing Jesus.  No one is immune from needing God in their life. 

In the end, it's those things that make us nerdy, or rather just ourselves, that are the best!  Take time to get to know others and appreciate the things they offer.  You don't know how long they'll be in your life, and you just might learn something.  And don't forget to give them a good-natured teasing.