Boy, oh boy!

Boys. Are. Fun.  I’m talkin’ ‘bout boyfriends and crushes here.

 

Guys can be sweethearts, goofballs, hopeless romantics, knights in shining armor, a tease, complete goobers, and so much more.  They’ll tease you, make you feel special, flirt with you, hurt you, use you, or have eyes only for you.  Of course, when he’s “your guy,” he can get on your nerves way too fast or do something that you think is inconceivable and ultimately upsets you, yet win your heart with a look, a sincere apology, cuteness, or whatever. Every. Stinkin. Time.

I’ve liked all kinds – the musician, the jock, the pretty-boy, the class-clown, the absolute sweetheart, the I-don’t-know-why-I-like-you-but-I-do guy, the jerk, etc.  I’ve also done the whole “lust at first sight” where you stare at a magazine picture (perfect abs, cute smile, flawless hair...), watch a show to see the super fine actor (i.e. the main character in Arrow), or take like a triple-take in real life (have you always come to this gym?!).

I’m still friends (or, well, FB friends) with most of the guys I’ve liked.  No relationship ever ended badly, thankfully.  It just ran its course or didn’t work out period because it was bad timing, it was only one-sided, I realized he was a jerk, I didn’t want a boyfriend, I was stupid, and the like.  No guy I’ve liked talks or sees me now for reasons like they’re happily married, they’re happily dating, we live in different states, we went to different colleges, I don’t want to waste my time, there’s no effort, and so on.  Every. Single. One.  

Sure, I’d like to be friends (real friends) with some of them because I still think they’re cool for whatever reason I was attracted to them in the first place.  For others, it’s either been way too long and there’s no hope or they burned me too bad and there’s no hope or, plainly, I’ve lost hope.  Still, I wouldn’t date any of them [again] because, on a scale of 1 to 10, none of them were my 11.  Not a single one.

Boys. Are. Fun.  I’m just going to continue to wait for my best fit.

… I do have a date this weekend  :)

Welcome Home!

“Welcome home!” is a phrase we’ve all heard before and, if you’re like me, you either think nothing of it, you think it’s sweet in the moment and then forget it, or you take it for granted. 

These two simple words were so sweet to hear and produced one of the biggest smiles on my face once I got back in the good ol’ US of A from a few of my trips abroad.  I was actually very disappointed to not have heard it on my last trip.  I was expecting to hear it and looking forward to the special greeting, even from a complete stranger.

It doesn’t matter how long I’ve been gone.  Being greeted with those words is enchanting because they hold so much meaning -- the trip is complete, I’m safe, I really am home.  Relief spills over me, while reverse culture shock may begin and familiar things come back into my life.

I love to travel to see and experience different countries and cultures.  The trips do many things, but one thing is to help me know that I love and appreciate America.  I am truly proud to be an American and would not wish to be anything but.  On my recent trip to China, I realized this and more about America and myself through a young man I met who was obsessed with the US.

I was basically a walking, talking, free English lesson that he whole-heartedly took advantage of.  I didn’t mind at first, yet by the real end (I tried to politely end the conversation several times) I was exhausted with all the focus to understand him and then respond with words he understood.  The topic he wanted to talk about was easy, thankfully.  It was non-stop about America while double-checking English phrases he’d learned intermittently.  He kept telling me things, like he loves America, that Obama is great, and America is the land of opportunity.  He even started singing our national anthem.

Of course, he wants to visit the US.  Yep, that’s the super crazy part -- he’s never even been to America!!  He taught himself English and stops random westerners to be his flash-in-the-pan tutors.  Naturally, I’m a rock star in his eyes.  He’s jealous of my nationality and way of life.

As our country celebrates Memorial Day today, I can’t help but think of this young man.  He has no real reality of America and yet he’s completely fascinated with it.  I just want a drop of his almost unbelievable enthusiasm for my own country.  I can’t help but think, how many people sacrificed years of service and the ultimate sacrifice of their life for my freedom, for me to able to proudly say that I am an American, for me to enjoy the life I have in a beautiful country, for me to feel safe, for me to hear “welcome home”?  It’s amazing all the things I take for granted.

Heartfelt thanks today and always to those who serve in the armed forces, both past and present.

Titles are like tattoos, right?

I don’t think I’ll ever get a tattoo (knock on wood) but that’s just me.  Sure, I’ve seen some really nice ones, like my friend Jen’s birds and script on her upper arm.  However, I have probably seen even more not so nice ones.  

Despite possibly not liking some tattoos at first glance, I like them more when the meaning behind the tattoo is explained.  I can definitely appreciate it more.  I think this is true of titles, too.

My title, Broken but Beautiful, has several meanings:

1.     I am broken.  I know we’ve all heard, “no one is perfect,” but it’s true.  No one has it all together or all the answers.  Granted, you may have things more together than someone else at a certain point in time or may not struggle with the same things as a friend, but you will not have it “all together” all the time and you will have struggles, too.  I realize my inability to be perfect all the time but definitely when I see my sin.  One set of verses I read that shined the light on my brokenness was Romans 3:10-12.  No one is righteous; no one does good.  No one even seeks after God.  I am broken and need a Savior.

2.     I really am beautiful!  I’ve been made in the image of God and am the child of some good-looking parents.  Plus, despite society making me feel like the b word should only be used for the top 2% of the population, I believe I am beautiful.  And although it may be cliché, both inside and out.  God has taken what was once broken, dark, and unworthy and made something beautiful, bright, and absolutely lovely.  It also doesn’t hurt that, over the years (like the last 3, haha!), I have learned to enhance my “God-given beauty” with make-up.

3.     I like alliterations.  They’re catchy.

4.     It was on my mind.  I recently saw a picture of a piece of pottery that had been broken but then repaired with gold to its original shape.  Now it is considered “more beautiful for having been broken.”

Whether you like my title more or appreciate it more, I have no idea but hopefully you’ll keep reading what I have to say to gain more understanding (like a good book, right?) and for sure now know the meaning behind the title. 

Daddio

Moving isn’t much fun, but you can see who’s got your back. 

I mean, c’mon…

Who will load and unload all my belongings after driving for hours?

Who will read a book with me and discuss it each week?

Who will, in his own way, tell me that the guy I like is a loser and that I should move on?

Who still claims to have a six-pack and then applauds me on my little muscles?

Who will go for a run with me and sometimes around twice (!)?

Who will give me advice about life things like healthcare and retirement?

Who bank rolls some super awesome vacations?

Who works hard to give me nice things?

Who takes better care of my car than I do?

Who can fix almost anything?

Who can I call when I’m lost and don’t know how to get to where I’m going?

Who loses at video games but still plays to have some bonding time?

Who will go on ice cream runs?

Who is a good example of being slow to anger and looking to God?

Who always says, “you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take”?

Who supports me in everything I do and have done?

Who loves me a lot?

My Dad, Jay Zoller, that’s who!  As always, he comes to my rescue, and he’s one of a kind. 

Past or present, he’s the absolute best Dad.