I love lists!

I love lists! 

They help…

me feel good when I cross something off from the “to do’s” ;)

keep me organized

set priorities

visualize what I need to do

determine what I want

                  and so much more!

I have made a list for near everything:

personal goals                                     

professional goals

what I want and look for in a guy               

life bucket list (what I want to do or achieve before I die)

30 before 30 (30 things to do or achieve before I turn 30)

what to buy                          

things to do                          

places to go                         

people to see

                  and the list goes on!  :)

Yep, even people. 

Since I just moved to a new city and don’t know anyone, I have a clean slate.  I can be or do whatever I want, really.  No one knows me, so they can’t put a label on me.  I like that idea.  I also like the idea of keeping in touch with family and friends that I won’t be able to see on a regular basis anymore.  This is where the list comes into play.  I made a list of people whom I love and invested in and whom I want to keep the relationship going. 

New friends will come, and everyone’s lives are busy.  I mean, you make time for what and for whom you love, so there’s no real excuse in my book.  Yet, face-to-face time, one of the best kinds of quality time, is limited.  But no matter how it happens or when it happens, some relationships continue. 

With some friends, I talk to them regularly on the phone or know that I can drive a few hours and spend the day with them and even have a place to crash.  With others, it’s more like a monthly get together or a catch-up text conversation.  Each one is different and several have that awesome “it’s like no time has passed by” vibe. 

Just last night I was able to meet up with a friend, who I haven’t seen or talked to in a while it seems.  I just love her!  She is so passionate about God and what she’s doing to help share the good news in Asia.  Talking with her is always encouraging and challenging because we share about what we’re learning, what we’re currently going through, and what we need such as prayer requests.  It’s refreshing.

She made the list. :)

Neighborhood Walks

Neighborhood watch alert:  Two females in workout clothes spotted on the south side of Fort Worth …critiquing houses.

Yep, that’d be me and my roommate.  We like to walk the neighborhood and say exactly what we think about someone’s house and yard.  Nothing's off limits.  It’s good bonding time. 

If someone were to eavesdrop, they would hear one, two, or a ton of phrases like the following:

“That’s terrible!”

“I like their front door.”

“It needs a double-decker patio” (i.e. outside patio/porch on ground floor and on second floor)

“Ugh.” *shudder*

“I’m so confused.” 

“What is that?!”

“Enough with the ugly awnings!”
“I like that one.  I give it an A.”

“Whatever is happening here needs to go.”
“Too flat.”

“Hate the color.”

“It has potential…”

“If they put more into the landscape, it would be a nice-looking house.”

“This one is cute!  I like it.”

“Nice wrap-around porch.”

“Needs a bigger porch.”

“Eh, they made do with what they had to work with.”

“The roof is too pointy”

“Well, we know why that house isn’t selling.”

“They need to get rid of that!”

“I really like this one!  Great porch, good color, nice yard…” 

“I would live there.”

So, if you want an honest critique, call us.  We’d love tell you what we think.  We’ll tell you how to make your house or yard look better, more inviting, or cuter.  We’re obviously pros… but wouldn’t charge too much :) 

Confession Time...

Confession: I’m a people-pleaser. 

I don’t want to disappoint anyone, I want everyone to be happy, and I don’t want to be the reason for the opposite of either of those things.  It’s kind of like a sickness.

When I do something for myself, I usually feel guilty or sometimes selfish.  Lately, I’ve been trying to rightly do things for me.

Confession: I don’t like when people are passive aggressive.

Why do others shoot daggers with their eyes or do other things to convey their disgust with your actions or words instead of just coming to you to speak about the problem??  They don’t know the situation completely, usually, and sometimes it’s absolutely none of their business.  They make you feel bad for making a decision.  Things make sense in your head but possibly makes the other person feel like they’re in a bind.  Sorry, but I’m not sorry.  Come talk to me in person.

Confession: I am selfish.

With only myself to be responsible for, I have the luxury to do what I want, when I want.  Yeah, it’s nice, but I also have to have checks to make sure I’m not being that person.  You know, the one who always has to get their way, who is always right, or who is always thinking the world revolves around them.  I have my friend’s voice saying, “It’s not always about you, Jessie” ringing in my ears.  I’m glad she said it, even though it’s always hard to swallow. 

Confession: I’m stubborn.

Once I’ve made up my mind, I’ve made up my mind.  I like to talk things out, though, and more times than not it’s just to get my thoughts out.  My mind is made up.  I appreciate anyone who will listen and give advice or suggestions when prompted.  To be fair, there are times when someone creeps in and changes my mind or someone gets a word in beforehand to sway me…  eh, good luck.  Work in progress, I suppose.

Confession: I have an opinion.

Sometimes I vocalize my opinions too much (and it gets me into trouble), while other times I don’t say anything at all but thoughts are reeling in my head.  For the former, I’m trying to be better about not giving unsolicited advice.  That’s hard.  I need to decipher between Jessie thoughts and God thoughts.  I’d much rather say something to someone that God wants me to say.  For the latter, it sometimes helps for me to be explicitly asked what I think in a group setting, for example.  It’s kind of nerve-wracking to be put on the spot like that but sometimes that’s the only way I speak [up].  I’ve grown in this area as I’ve gotten older but still need help.  Then, of course, a lot of the time, I feel like I need to take time to gather my thoughts and say what I really want and in the manner or tone I want.  Yeah, my opinionated self can be too much.  As a friend said, “I need to murder self, not just die to self!”

Hablo un poco de Español

At my work, a lot of the people I see speak Spanish and only Spanish, so it’s frustrating to not be able to effectively communicate how and what I want.  It’s equally frustrating to have an interpreter in the room and not know what the client and interpreter are truly saying.  It’s as if it’s a secret code but you can’t decipher it or like someone is talking behind your back but they’re actually right in front of you!  It’s also really frustrating to hunt someone down who has the time to translate for an interview.

Having to deal with all of that has made me highly motivated to learn Spanish.  I mean, I always wanted to learn another language.  Granted, I thought it would be French because I think it’s so beautiful and because a dream of mine was to open a boulangerie.  I could bake and speak French all day and be so happy living in Paris, mais oui. 

I did end up going to Paris with my brother and spoke French with the natives.  I had just finished my third semester of it in college.  It came in handy to get around, buy things, order food, and such.  Not gonna lie, I was pretty proud of myself for speaking French, and for that reason and many, many others, that trip is one of my most favorite trips.  I fell for with France and speaking French.  I can’t remember much French now, but I most definitely want to go back to France and see the countryside, at the very least. 

Back to that wish of opening a boulangerie…  Well, I went to one in the States and decided I love to bake but I don’t want to get up at the crack of dawn to do it!  So, that’s out. 

Anyway, I unfortunately didn’t take any more language classes in college and absolutely none in graduate school, but thank goodness I had taken a language way back when because it is helping me now as I teach myself Spanish.  (Any hints or tips would be appreciated!)  It’s funny, though, that French words pop into my head when I’m searching for the Spanish words.  For instance, whenever I want to say yes, I almost always blurt out “oui” instead of “si”!

The ladies at work laugh in a kind way and help me, mainly with pronunciation.  They’re really nice and patient with me, which is necessary since I speak like a toddler, at best.  I test phrases on them that I’ve translated through an on-line dictionary (scary, I know) and have started to memorize.  It’s nice to have something in common, something to work on together as I get to know them and them me.  They all say I’ll be speaking Spanish in no time. 

Like I said, I’ve always wanted to speak another language.  I just didn’t think it would be Spanish.  I’ll try my best to learn it, though, to be able to communicate, to not be frustrated, and to connect with people.

Tears, Soccer, and Love

Two things happened yesterday that haven't happened in a long time.

1)    I cried

2)    I played soccer

Two separate events.

Crying was brought on by a lot of factors, like life struggles, missing my friends, and losing my keys.  I had been talking to one of my best friends on the phone about life and not knowing what to do in a situation.  Strangely enough, I had already envisioned her giving me a hug earlier that day.  I began to cry and wished that she were really there to give me a hug.  She lovingly listened to me even when I choppily spoke between sobs and said that, if she could, she’d be there with me right then.  Love her and miss her so much!

I sniffled while thinking of the friends I’ve left, not having anyone here in Texas who truly knows me, and trying to find my keys.  I called my brother and, thankfully, he came over to give me a hug and to help me search.

No luck on the keys, but I went off to play soccer that evening anyway.  I figured it would be a good way to take out some frustration and whatnot, even though I haven’t played in 8 or 9 years.  That was the least of my worries.  But yeah, I might have stupidly signed up for an adult, summer soccer league without having played in an organized game since high school.  Yikes!  I thought we’d have subs, that I could ease back into things.  Wrong.  I played the entire game, which was two, 45-minute halves.  Double yikes! 

It felt good to play, actually.  I realized very quickly, though, how much I’ve missed playing a team sport, how competitive I can get, and how out of “soccer shape” I am.

Oh, well.  It’s just every week.  Bring on the icing and soreness!   Bring on the best friend talks and the brotherly love!  Hold the tears and the losing of keys!