Drive

Let me be brutally honest.  I don’t like to drive and my life feels like a small wreck right now.

I have decided that saying that I hate to drive is too strong, but I definitely don’t like it. 

Blame the terrible wrecks I was in as a child or the even more terrible and scary wrecks as an adult.  Blame the semi trucks.  I mean, who doesn’t get freaked out when passing them anyway!  Blame the boredom that comes during super long journeys.  Definitely blame other drivers.  Blame the close calls of going below E.  Whoops!  Blame the sitting and doing nothing when I like to be active.  Blame the lack of road trips in my life.

Granted, driving is a necessary evil.  Obviously you have to get from point A to point B and those points usually aren’t walk-able or bike-able.  Sad day.

Really though, there are just so many pros and cons to driving for me. 

MAJOR con: other drivers.  Duh.

There are definitely some idiots on the road:

     The Speedsters.  They’re just crazy and may have a death wish.

     The let-me-turn-on-my-blinker-for-one-blink-and-then-get-over-in-front-of-you.  Clearly that small space is for my car.  Good gracious!  Let’s not think about the fact that if anyone slammed on their brakes for whatever reason so many people would be toast.

     The Tailgaters. ‘Nough said.

     The Elite (i.e. super annoying) Tailgaters.  You’re like, “Dude, I’m already going literally 20 mph over the speed limit.  Get off my back!”

     The Slowpokes.  Of course you always get behind them when you need to be somewhere in a timely manner.

     The you-most-definitely-should-NOT-be-in-the-fast-lane.  You ain’t going that fast; get over.

     The “What are you doing?!” or “What. Are. You. Doing?”  I say this in several ways to another car for a myriad of reasons but it can be, “Oh.  You’re on your phone or texting or trying to do anything but drive!  Got it.”

     The turn-off-your-stupid-brights.  Trust me, I see you.  And you’re obnoxious.

Then there’s all the construction and oh so much traffic.  All the freakin’ time!  It’s never ending.  How could the roads possibly be that bad?!  How could there be so many people on the road at once?!  All the freakin’ time!

Plus, it’s weird that I tend to always get sleepy (like have fluttering eyelids) while driving.  That’s not good!  I’m the one driving.  I need to be awake.  I do the whole blare music, call someone, roll the windows down, or whatever trick but I think I just need a chauffeur. 

You know, I might enjoy driving more if I had a sports car again.  Driving my little manual around was quite fun, especially when the top was down!  So yeah, my next big purchase might just be that long awaited sports car…

I would definitely go just as fast as I am now in my non-sports car because I treat it as if is a sports car.  Doesn’t always work out…  I’ve noticed, though, that as I’ve gotten older and am more relaxed behind the wheel that I have a need for speed.  That’s not necessarily good either!  I’m actually really cautious with others in the car with me.  If it’s just me, however, it’s a whole new game.  I mean, I like to go fast.  I think there might be a direct correlation between speeding and impatience, though.  I also go faster when I’m running late like basically everyone I know.  Not saying it’s good, just that it’s unfortunately common…  Then there’s the “Ugh.  I’m going fast and you decide to pull out in front of me.  Really?!”  C’mon, you know you’ve said it, too.

There is one saving grace: cruise control.  Best invention.  Bless that inventor’s soul.

Other great things about driving would be being able to process things, listen to music, roll down the windows, and just think about things in general without much interruption.  I almost always drive alone, so what else am I gonna do?!  I’m thinking and writing (more like saying out loud to record) this blog, for example.  I usually think about people I haven’t talked to in a while and give them a ring.  Or text.  Yes, I have been known to text and drive.  It’s a terrible habit and one that should be broken.  I’ll let you know about that later.  Anyway, one of the best things is getting to my destination and seeing my family's or friend's beautiful, smiling faces :)

I suppose a time I do like to drive is when I’m not the driver, ha!  I had a carpool buddy for grad school and it was awesome!  One, we became best friends.  Two, she would drive and I would sit there and we would talk and the time would fly by.  It was wonderful.

I do also remember some really good times with my family in the car.  We didn’t ever take road trips, so one of the best memories I have is of my Dad and brothers while driving to and from church.  Oh my goodness.  There is just no way my Dad’s impromptu raps will EVER be equaled!!  Hahaha!!  Then there’s the memory of all 5 of us basically screaming at the top of our lungs to GLAD.  Never to be replicated either.

See, I just need to not be the driver.

Funny.  As soon I said that I thought of the fact that I always want to be the driver of my life, but, honestly, I need God to be the driver.  Now more than ever, it seems. 

Back to that comment of life being a wreck.  In so many ways, mine feels like one right now.  I need a good, it’s-okay-to-melt-in-my-arms, Mom-type hug.  I need to cry but that might not happen.  I need to sleep.  I need the brighter days to come quick.  I need to believe that God really is driving and that He will take care of all the crazies on the road, that He will get me through the hairpin turns, that He will help me go the speed I need to be going, and that He will help me enjoy the journey.

Because there’s no denying my cruise control is faulty at the moment.