Have Faith

"Let your faith be bigger than your fear."

This quote hangs above my new bed and the faith part proved to be a good reminder today because...

It has begun.  The time it takes to unpack.  The time it takes to get settled at a new home and new job.  The time it takes to get to know new people.  

This is the same basically anywhere I go and the amount of time for each varies.  Thankfully, I've been here in SD before so I feel slightly at home and have my bearings.  I've also already done fun things with friends.  So, I'm not too worried about all the above but do want things to pan out quickly.  Ugh.  I can be impatient, for sure. 

I needed the faith reminder because...

It has begun.  The pull to be in OK and TX.  The feeling of being undatable or never finding the right guy.  The questioning thought, "Why am I here?!"

This also isn't entirely new.  It has just been heightened because I want to hug one of my best friends as she mourns the loss of her grandmother, there has been another great guy put on the "not interested" list, I want to say goodbye to a friend before she moves away, and I have high doubts anyone will visit since it hasn't happened in the past. 

The questioning thought is somewhat new, yet I don't seem to know why I'm anywhere I am until after I leave or after I meet a certain person.  I look back and can say, "That's why I was here, that's why God put me here."  Things like learning a life lesson, having a conversation with a patient or coworker about Christ, helping those around me as best I can, displaying Christ to a non-believer, being a friend, gaining forever friends, and so on.

Right now, all I can say is, for whatever reason, I'm supposed to be in SD.  I don't understand and I don't get it now, but I think this because I looked at a lot of jobs all over and applied to several.  This one worked, like all the other jobs I've had, and seemed a good fit.  It just made sense to me so I have some peace, just need renewed faith God knows exactly what's up, He has a plan. 

I recently told a friend the following: 

"Now, even though I may never get to hear your thoughts and feelings about religion/God/beliefs/hangups/etc, I know they're there.  They're there for me, too.  I'll just say that I think spiritually should be simple.  It is about a relationship with God, which is made possible by taking away our sins through the grace extended to us by the perfect sacrifice of His Son, Jesus Christ.  "For He satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul He fills with good things."  Psalm 107:9 

So, I will continue to encourage you to seek the truth now.  You could open the Bible, read books, ask questions, be open, express doubt or unbelief.  God can handle it."

It's true!  I have to take my own advice, especially in light of my present situation. 

I have a faith; I know God cares.  Still, I have hangups and doubts.  Sometimes I don't believe that God is good.  Sometimes I don't believe that God will provide.  Sometimes I don't believe God has plan or, really, that He's going to share the plan with me.  

However, I choose to take things to God and keep doing what I can, to have faith.  Daily. 

Where there is fear of the unknown, have faith. 

Where there is stress, have faith.

Where there is sorrow or disappointment, have faith. 

Where there is hope or a dream, have faith. 

Where there is joy, have faith. 

Where there is peace, have faith. 

Where there is love, have faith.